used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
