She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I will die if light touches me.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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