We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
