My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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