i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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