was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
