Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I need to calm my uterus...
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize