could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize