...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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