I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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