omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
