I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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