Quick, to the slutcave!
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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