kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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