After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize