i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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