She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
