I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
So vagazzling was a success
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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