there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
