This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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