her vagine was all disorganized.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
