I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
