from now on my penis is your penis
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
