if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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