ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
