the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize