that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
