i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
