No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize