Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
