VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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