After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
