im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Still dying that you shit outside
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
