how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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