He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
babies were throwing up all over the place
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
