I never want to see another naked old woman again.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
