Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
