One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
