i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize