Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
