You made me cry and you don't even care
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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