I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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