i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Randomize
