is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
