Im at strip club and am horny
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Randomize
