I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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