Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Too much gin, very little bucket
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
