i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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