Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
