I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
