Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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